I know that sometimes life is tough, especially when you have decisions you need to make pretty regularly. But i consider my life somewhat ‘controlled’ whatever that means? I have a lot of reflecting time these days..Whether it be at work when im grating cheese, preparing for the lunch rush, stuffing hundreds of olives.. It seems i tend to have more then enough ‘alone time’, sometimes this can be a bad thing. I over analyse many situations but it makes me become a really efficient devils advocate.. which means i can see one point from many different perspectives, and i spend A LOT of time thinking about what I am going to do with my life, what is it that i TRULY aspire to be without anyone else’s input on whether it is good enough.. I find that every day gets better, things become clearer and its like i am on my way to something good! But then i think about the circumstances of how it could most probably lead me to something that really isnt going to get me anywhere? Sometimes I guess it isnt ALL about what you enjoy.. its about relating to things and adapting to the enjoyment it may provide. It really isn’t about being a socialite for me, im over that highschool popularity thing.. now its time for me to plan out and think seriously..
i know im young but this is real, so when i take a chance i wont ever look back!
but i might reconsider my options next time 
hah, thanks for reading. as you can see im confused :/ about so much
